Addicted to resetting life goals
The constant “new me” cycle we can be in.
In the last couple of years, I have become interested in self-improvement. I’ve observed hundreds of videos on Youtube, listened to podcasts, and read a multitude of books. And I still do. After a while, I began to see patterns and recurring subjects, and these days I skip a lot of videos and books because I’ve already seen and read about the topics in multiple variations and explanations. Exercising keeps your energy levels high and keeps you physically, but also mentally, in top condition. Meditation is deservingly getting more and more attention. Overconsuming content like social media and Netflix disarranges the ability to focus on the goals you want to achieve. Expressing positivity and gratitude literally improves your health.
I finished The Slight Edge by Jeff Olson a while back and this book is focused on consistency in your actions and although I knew it is important to have good habits, it never occurred to me what the impact can be of doing them regularly.
One of the most crucial necessities for learning new things or bettering yourself, is doing something that want to achieve consistently.
Often I lose the battle of consistency. We tend to bite off more than we can chew. I’ll be watching a motivational Youtube video and feeling like a changed person for 3 days doing all sorts of things — end up disappointed after I didn’t notice fast results — and repeat from the start. Jeff Olson’s idea is that you should do very small actions over a very long period to see the compound effects that result from these little daily actions.
These daily little tasks are so easy to do, that they are likewise as easy not to do. And that’s where people tend to go wrong. It’s so easy to skip something like doing 20 push-ups because you feel like it doesn’t add anything, but it does. If you do that for 5 years and raise the amount bit by bit, you will be scared by your results.
We want things very fast nowadays. We are distracted and impatient. If you look at Instagram you’ll see teen millionaires across the board. What you don’t see is that they took over their parents' company, or that they worked their … off for the last 5 years because they lived with no free time. And just because some people (0.00001%) got famous super fast, it doesn’t mean that that's a rational option. Even if you want that, you have to put in the daily actions.
You have to watch out because people use our impatient characteristics for their financial success.
They’ll say that it is possible to lose crazy amounts of weight in a month. It may be possible, but after that nightmare, you most likely won’t continue because it was too much to handle. Turning actions into long-term habits isn’t easily done. That’s also why I was resetting my life goals continuously and why I think a lot of people are too. We are down — to get motivated by claims that it can be done fast — and end up disappointed that it is harder than we thought, therefore, we try a new method.
Stop constantly buying and trying new things and stick to one easy action each day. In the time you’ve tried all these methods, you could have done so much if you just have stuck to one.
Growing your tree
I want to talk about this photo I admire by Lucas. I see this image as it represents our goals. Lots of people float around in the grey area thinking: “where should I plant my tree?”.
Growing a tree takes persistence. Just like in real life. Constantly taking care of it. But if you forget it, it will shrink or die and you’ll have to start over. Well, how can it happen then, that these trees die? Maybe you think your tree is in a bad area, you don’t like that self-help method, so you try planting a new tree. Or you don’t like playing the trumpet at all, so you stop caring about that tree.
Maybe you see someone with multiple trees and you want to join that area, so you leave your tiny growing tree and start over. See what I’m saying?
If you just stick to your own spot, your own little “trying to be healthier by exercising — spot” or whatever and you water that tree every day by doing your actions, you will have your own grown tree, not that little seed that’s constantly being thrown from place to place. As you get better at growing your tree, you might try to grow more. But you have to make sure to keep all your trees intact if you want to keep all those skills.
You may have planted your tree in the smoking section and you want to get rid of this addiction. So you try to chop that tree down. You might accidentally return to that section to water the tree by your impulses. And then it starts growing a little again. By not looking at the internal cause of the addiction, the roots will always be there. You may get rid of some of the roots, but there will always be a little bit urging for that drip of water. And instead of getting mad about that, it is better to accept that, so it will become easier and easier to keep your tree dry.
Perhaps we can divide the trees into good and bad trees. The bad trees ask for water, like addictions, and the good trees don’t ask for water. Because the bad trees ask, it is easier to give them water than the good trees. Yet eventually, by continuously watering your good tree, it will become a habit and easier to do.
I feel like I’ve been throwing seeds here and there in the last years, watering some of them and moving on after it didn’t grow quickly. Now I come to understand that this is a foolish method and I try to focus on keeping a few of them alive and growing.
I hope you can get rid of some bad trees and plant some good trees. And if you do, keep doing the actions daily and you’ll see the changes over the years to come. And please, don’t be overly motivated after reading this ;). The motivation will go away soon. Just keep reminding yourself that compounding your actions will add up hugely in the future. When you start seeing results, you will be blown away by what more you can do.
I would like to suggest reading The Slight Edge by Jeff Olson. It’s a great book. Thanks for reading my article! Leave a comment with your thoughts or send me a message via Instagram. I’m always open for a conversation. Have a great day.
